It’s unclear who the actual April Fool is – the guest who asks us these absurd questions or the Holiday Advisor who has to maintain composure (and not burst into laughs) while holding a conversation.
Here are some bits that exasperated us, annoyed us and now, in hindsight, tickle us:
- We will not sleep at all, can you not charge ‘extra-bedding charges’?
- I have booked the entire villa, all extra mattresses should be free of charge, no?
- I need a room with a lake view, and a view of the mountains. It has to be on the ground floor. Has to overlook the front lawn also.
- If I booked a riverfront home I expect no one to step into the river.
- When is the best time to get fresh seafood in Mahabaleshwar?
- How many trees are there at the farmhouse plantation?
- What tiles are used in the flooring? Are they Italian marble?
- It’s my child’s birthday. Please get a complimentary 2 kg Mickey Mouse cake for him.
- We are very light eaters and will not eat much, so do not charge us for meals.
- If I take my own bed and pillow, will I still have to pay extra bedding?
- There was a cook in the home we booked earlier. I want him for this booking as well.
- My kid just turned 6′ please count him as ‘5’ and do not charge for accommodation and meals.
- We are 12 women celebrating a special day. We all want special (read: different) dishes, and minimum 6 types of desserts.
- So what if you started including meals in your tariff in October? I made the booking in September and refuse to pay for meals and extra guests now.
- I am going to share the recipe of the chutney that I want when I sit for lunch.
- We will not play Holi with colours or water… But let the kids play a little with colours and water.
- Please ensure that the generator in the villa does not wake us up.
- I am influencer (read: has no more than 200 followers) and I will put a post for you. Please give me 2 nights, 3 days stay for me and my family.
- Your villa is anyway empty. Give it to me at 50% tariff.
All characters and corporations or establishments appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.