19 Shocking Things Guests Say

It’s unclear who the actual April Fool is – the guest who asks us these absurd questions or the Holiday Advisor who has to maintain composure (and not burst into laughs) while holding a conversation. 

Here are some bits that exasperated us, annoyed us and now, in hindsight, tickle us: 

  1. We will not sleep at all, can you not charge ‘extra-bedding charges’?
  2. I have booked the entire villa, all extra mattresses should be free of charge, no?
  3. I need a room with a lake view, and a view of the mountains. It has to be on the ground floor. Has to overlook the front lawn also.
  4. If I booked a riverfront home I expect no one to step into the river.
  5. When is the best time to get fresh seafood in Mahabaleshwar?
  6. How many trees are there at the farmhouse plantation?
  7. What tiles are used in the flooring? Are they Italian marble?
  8. It’s my child’s birthday. Please get a complimentary 2 kg Mickey Mouse cake for him.
  9. We are very light eaters and will not eat much, so do not charge us for meals.
  10. If I take my own bed and pillow, will I still have to pay extra bedding?


  11. There was a cook in the home we booked earlier. I want him for this booking as well.
  12. My kid just turned 6′ please count him as ‘5’ and do not charge for accommodation and meals.
  13. We are 12 women celebrating a special day. We all want special (read: different) dishes, and minimum 6 types of desserts.
  14. So what if you started including meals in your tariff in October? I made the booking in September and refuse to pay for meals and extra guests now.
  15. I am going to share the recipe of the chutney that I want when I sit for lunch.
  16. We will not play Holi with colours or water… But let the kids play a little with colours and water.
  17. Please ensure that the generator in the villa does not wake us up.
  18. I am influencer (read: has no more than 200 followers) and I will put a post for you. Please give me 2 nights, 3 days stay for me and my family.
  19. Your villa is anyway empty. Give it to me at 50% tariff.

All characters and corporations or establishments appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

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